The Beginning

I have been asked over and over why we came to the decision to adopt or why China and not the US?  The only answer I have is because God told us to.  We began thinking about adoption back in 2006 before we had Eli.  I had had a few miscarriages, and so we felt called to look into it.  We actually started an adoption through Guatemala back then.  It never seemed quite "right".  Halfway through it I became pregnant with Eli, and because they did not allow you to be pregnant, we put it on hold.  That was a miracle in itself because we had been trying a couple years.  Not long after that, the US shut its doors to adoptions with Guatemala beacuse of illegal adoptions and buying/selling babies.  People in the process that had been matched with a child went through hell trying to either get their child, or they lost ALOT of money.  We were saved from that heartache by God's grace.  We knew we still wanted to adopt, and even felt called to China for that adoption, but you had to be 30 and PM was only 28 at the time.  We have waited for Guatemala to reopen, but they still haven't.
Fast forward 4 years.  We have been struggling with the decision for two years now.  I am always ready to jump in and PM sits back and thinks.  We balance each other that way.  He drives me crazy that way too :)
It is EXPENSIVE to give a child a home.  That was his main concern.  He thinks about the future, I say the future is the future...Well, I was so crushed because we really were on opposite sides of the court on this.  Not that he didn't want to adopt, but he didn't want to spend the money.  It really is scary when you look at your life and finances written down on paper.  Like PM said, it makes you look really boring.  And it's scary.  You wonder how we even live day to day.  But God provides.  I knew that if we had faith in Him and listened to our calling he put on us, He would provide.  I asked three of my prayer warriors to pray for God to either change PMs heart about this adoption, or take it out of my heart.  I know these ladies and their prayers are meaningful and ones that God has no choice but to listen to :)  I asked them to agree with me on this. 
Fast forward a few months, and PM and I are really butting heads about this.  I finally sat down and showed him a plan I had come up with...I always have plans.  They may not be sensible or work, but I always have them :)  At the end of it, he literally told me I was CRAZY.  I knew this was the end and I had to give up my dream of adoption.  Well, that was on a Thursday.  That Sunday our church body was discussing serving and relationships.  One of our members was telling how they had helped serve at St Vincent DePaul, and the experience she had.  We discussed giving of yourself, and if not now, when?  We are not promised tomorrow, and our times of today with all the destruction and evil show it more and more every day.  Our pastor quoted the verse that the fields are ripe for the harvest.  The harvest is plentiful but the laborers are few. (Matthew 9:37-38)  THE NEXT DAY PM said YES!  He said he wanted to get files of some kids to look at.  That didn't last long though because he couldn't stand seeing their faces and reading their issues.  He said it was like picking at cattle.  When you think all these kids need homes, you feel guilty that their problems or "issues" may be too much for you.  It breaks your heart.  I kept thinking if either of my kids had a "file" at these kids ages, both of them would have been turned down.  Grayson puked constantly and had asthma and ear/sinus issues and Eli was delayed in everything from birth from sitting, crawling, walking, talking, and so on.  THANK YOU LORD that He does not look at our "files" and think we are not worthy of saving!!  I know I was quite delayed in a few areas! ;)
After the 72 hours they give you to make a decision, I was still in agony over which to choose.  We sent them to our pediatircian, who was awesome and called a few friends.  She let us know which she thought.  We prayed and I decided (PM couldn't like I said) and I know she was hand picked by God to be ours!  I cannot say that I haven't let Satan creep in here and there and put fear over her issues or the money or the travel or the "after we get home", but I just pray and God immediately stops it right there. 
I am SOOO very excited to be on this journey God put us on.  His blessing in return are immeasurable.  For instance, the loan we have is taken directly from Pms check.  Well, THAT VERY WEEK that the payments began coming out PM got his a raise!!  I have been given multiple opportunities not expected in both my jobs to teach extra classes and in my salon that have increased my pay!  God has provided!  People are so excited for us and wanting to help every way possible. 
I got the name of the blog at 2 am.  The verse to the side came to my head.  How can you say you have faith but have no works?  I will show you my faith BY MY WORKS.  Isabel is already my blessing from this.

About Isabel:
She is going to be two at the end of June.  They estimated her birthday beacuse she was abandoned at a hospital.  She was also premature.  She was so sick and weak she couldn't suck from a bottle and was dropper fed for a week.  Her "issues" are sight and hearing problems.  We do not know to what extent because orphans do not get the best Dr care, obviously.  We trust God with whatever problems we may incur.  Would we have given away Grayson or Eli because of their "issues"?  No way.  We are also very familiar with speech, occupational therapy, etc that we may have to go into.  Her name was on our list, and PM liked it the best.  I looked it up, and it means "God's gift"  How much more appropriate could that be??  Her second name is her Chinese name.  Her name now is Yang Wen.  They call her Wenwen in her file.  I looked that up and it means blessed.  So her name is so appropriate for her.  My mom's middle name is Lynn with a Y and mine is Dyan with a Y, so I put in the Y.  The boys call her WynWyn when they refer to her now.

Where we are in the process:
We just finished up our homestudy and it is in review now.  After it is approved, we have to send off what is called the I800A to be able to bring an immigrant into the US.  When we land she will be a US citizen!  After we send that off we go for our THIRD finger printing and background check.. This takes about two months total.  After that comes back, everything goes to China, is translated, reviewed, and we get our Log In Date, or LOI.  We expect to travel about 3-4 months from then.  Grueling and long process...but SHE will be worth it!  We will be in China sometime late October to late November.  Grayson is coming, Eli is staying.  That is going to be SOOOO difficult.  I know though with the time change and go, go, go he would be miserable.  And with Isa's world being rocked, I need to be able to comfort and take  care of her. 

So, that will definately be my longest and most drawn out post...Had to explain everything :)  Like I said, I really hope to keep up with this, especially when we are in China.